by any means

the problem with the lifestyle I’ve found myself in is that it is the cause of my revolutionary politics. As such, I can’t dismiss my educational history or my position of privilege as unnecessary or unethical parts of my being, because they have led me to where I am. What I can say is that the way I have come to my politics has been a series of happy accidents and a great deal of arduous unlearning, a process I am still and will always be undergoing. What I’d like to offer as well here is the idea that where we come from – our positionality – can be a tool. When we rebel, we must remember that we are rebelling as much against ourselves as the system that created us. Knowing that we came from the very place we now find repulsive can be inspiring of a reflexive state pf being necessary to continue the internal revolution. Julia kristeva discusses the need to be in a constant state of revolt – discomfort, interrogation, anger. we need that within ourselves, towards ourselves, just as much as we need to maintain that towards the state, the institutions, the structures of control. with this in mind, however, it is also important that we accept parts of our past as a part of the path we’re on. we have a responsibility to that past, as much as we may feel we have overcome it, challenged it, changed it. we may be completely different people, believe different things, live different ways, but we once lived that way, believed those things. as we progress, we must remember that past self in a sense to remind us that we are never not learning, to remind us that others too can learn and change, but also to take responsibility for that person, and how they might have used and abused their power or their position. through this self-analysis, we can come to see the structures that have given us privilege and power over others. as people who have benefited from these structures, it is OUR responsibility to destroy them. they must be destroyed completely. to ensure that we have the strength to do what is necessary, again, we must maintain and cultivate our disgust at these systems of inequality and violence, and at our past selves. we must simultaneously maintain the memory of ourselves, while destroying all that made that person possible. in the process of this destruction, think about the things that led you to where you are, the things that tore your blinders off, that enlightened you, the things that made you uncomfortable enough that you had to change. think about these things as ingredients in the creation of a better path. nurse them even in the present. as you destroy the oppressive forces in yourself and in your world, think about what it would take for a new set of eyes to grow into anarchy, to avoid taking the privilege of existing systems, to understand the importance of avoiding systems altogether. what did it take for you to see? how would a child grow up without these systems that you grew up with. without imagining the eyes of a child, we’ll resort to the habits of our own parents. this cannot happen. the family is the first institution that must be destroyed, but we cannot destroy the concept of new life. we must find a way to educate without institutionalizing…